


A Study in Reincarnation

by RevanchismRules



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, Sherlock (TV), The Avengers (Marvel Movies), Thor (Movies)
Genre: Bro Sigyn helps her brother and husband get laid, F/F, Genderfluid Loki (Marvel), Loki likes dicks, M/M, Past Loki/Sigurd, Sherlock is Reincarnation of Sigurd, Sigurd/Sherlock just likes Loki, Sigyn and Sigurd are twins, Sigyn likes chicks, Sigyn was Loki's wife but that was a ruse
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-02-06
Updated: 2020-09-29
Packaged: 2021-02-28 02:34:03
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 8
Words: 17,922
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22576393
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RevanchismRules/pseuds/RevanchismRules
Summary: Loki had a family before the Avengers, Nari and Vali, his wife Sigyn and his brother-in-law Sigurd. Unbeknownst to Asgard, Sigurd was far more than a brother-in-law and Sigyn was more like a sister to our favourite God. Fate is cruel and rips his family away and starts Loki's descent into madness. After the events of the Avengers, Loki finds a certain detective who looks exactly like his long lost Sigurd and things are radically different from there on out.(Unrelated to Of Gods and Mortals)
Relationships: Sherlock Holmes/Loki (Marvel)
Comments: 23
Kudos: 49





	1. In the Beginning

**Author's Note:**

> This is a plotbunny that has refused to leave. I'm still working on Of Gods and Mortals but couldn't help but write this; this should be a shorter fic as well.  
> Italics indicate memories of the past (though Sigurd being there also does that).

_Loki sits in a grassy field on Aflheim, Lady Sigyn the niece of King Thrymir of Aflheim sits beside him. It’s a beautiful day and the sun makes Sigyn’s hair shine a lovely gold. Loki smiles despite himself, he hadn’t been looking forward to the negotiations with Aflheim but seeing Sigyn again had made it worth it. The two had met around a decade ago and had gotten along well at the time, and Sigyn was just as lovely as he’d remembered. A fair Lady, who was kind, but with a spark of mischief, she wasn’t like most of the Aesir women. Then again the women of Aflheim all tended to favor less of the traditional women’s roles and Sigyn was no exception. She cared little for cooking and tending to a home, she was one for adventure, a bit like Sif but more prone to reason than violence._

_Of all the women Loki had met, Sigyn was the only one he wouldn’t mind marrying. It was obvious that he’d have to do so eventually, and to wait too long would ensure an arranged marriage which could be disastrous. But how to go about courting Sigyn? Unlike Thor, Loki had never exactly been good with women and had yet to actually get one into his bed, not that he’d tried very hard or at all really. Sigyn had always been easier to talk to, but that was merely friendly conversation. However, it mattered little if he could not get the approval of her twin brother, Sigurd. Loki had heard tales about the young Lord, but had never met him before. He was rumored to be vain and harsh but it was hard to imagine one like that being twins with Sigyn. Sigurd was due to arrive at any moment and Loki couldn’t help but tense. The men of Asgard were brutes that had mocked and jeered at him at every opportunity and if Sigurd did the same it would make things very difficult._

_A wonderfully deep voice calls out, “Sigyn, Prince Loki.”_ _  
  
_

_Loki’s head snaps up to find Sigurd approaching, the brilliant sun casts a shadow on his features so for a few seconds all he registers is Sigurd’s build- he’s tall and lanky like himself not overly muscular like most of the Aesir. Then finally he’s out of the shadows and Loki can clearly see his face. Sigurd is striking, beautiful dark brown hair with soft curls, striking blue-green eyes that seem to stare through him, and high cheekbones that speak of his royal lineage. A smile lights up Sigurd’s face and Loki can’t bring himself to look away._

“LOKI!”

The God blinks, snapped out of his memories by the booming voice of his brot- Thor. He scowls in annoyance and snaps “What?”

It’s the Norns damned Stark that responds. “Chill Rudolph, we just thought you might want out of your cell-”

“I don’t. Leave me alone,” Loki snarls.

For once Stark doesn’t seem to have a response, clearly surprised by the dismissal. Thor stares at him in confusion before understanding seems to dawn on his face and it pales. “Brother, I’m sorry. I forgot-”

Loki laughs bitterly. “Of course you did.” Thor never was good at remembering dates and Loki could never forget, at least not this date, the anniversary of the worst day of his life. Sigurd, Sigyn, Nari, and Vali, all taken from him in a cruel twist of fate. He vaguely registers the sound of their retreat and Thor pleading with Stark to let him be, instead going back to his memories. Only this time they were not quite so pleasant.

_Loki had been trying to settle a dispute at the far border of Asgard, it was a minor issue, some peasant had accused another of stealing their livestock and the other accused the first of doing the same in retaliation. Sigyn and Sigurd were on Aflheim assisting in negotiations with Vanaheim. Well, Sigyn was, Sigurd was likely scowling and calling all the ambassadors idiots as he was want to do- how he loves his prickly Prince. The twins were safe and sound with Frigga and Eir as well as a host of healers. Everything was fine. Until it wasn’t._

_Loki feels Sigurd’s death as it happens, one second he’s there and the next there’s a painful emptiness in Loki’s mind where Sigurd should be. So shocked and pained is he, that he doesn’t even notice anything around him, he screams and howls, and his seidr whips around violently, spitting out flames randomly. Those around him scream in shock and fear as Loki’s magic lashes out. He’s vaguely aware of his mother and Eir approaching and trying to calm him, but he can’t. Then everything goes black._

_Loki awakes to silence, which only heightens his emotions. Sigurd is gone, he’ll never get to see his children grow. They won’t grow old together… There’s motion out of the corner of his eye and he sees his mother come to him. She looks so heartbroken, but why would she mourn Sigurd’s death so intensely?_

_“Loki, my dear one, you know about Sigyn’s death do you not? Were- were you aware that Sigurd was killed too?”_

_The surprise must be evident on Loki’s face because his mother sighs. “I’m sorry, Loki, I know you and Sigurd were close. To lose both him and Sigyn...” Frigga hangs her head and begins to weep._

_Loki blinks black tears trying his hardest not to cry. You have no idea mother…._

_“There- there was an attempted coup on Alfheim. The King and princess were saved by their guards, but Sigyn and Sigurd had no such protection. The negotiations with Vanaheim were amiable so they weren’t thought to be in danger, especially as they’re not directly in line for the throne. The attackers didn’t care. They seemed to want to kill all members of the royal family of Aflheim. Oh my son… I didn’t know. A guard came to us and told us you’d been injured, Eir and I went to you and were forced to sedate you. When we came back- they- all the guards in the hall were dead. Nari and Vali- they were killed, Loki._

Loki growls lowly, he doesn’t remember what happened directly after that, but he can still remember the anguish. His chest suddenly feels tight. Loki shakes his head, no he’s not going to cry, he can’t show weakness in front of his enemies. There are SHIELD agents everywhere, likely monitoring his every move. No, he won’t weep. He’d promised himself he’d never again shed so many tears.

_The day of the funeral was the second-worst day of his life. It meant that it was real, none of them were coming back. King Thrymir had allowed Sigyn and Sigurd to have their funeral on Asgard along with Nari and Vali, a kindness that had not been expected but Loki cared little at the time. This, unfortunately, meant a large affair, most of Asgard was present along with many from Aflheim and Vanaheim. A funeral for four was unheard of, and for members of the royal family of Asgard and Aflehim, well it was bound to draw a crowd to marvel at the spectacle. Loki wishes no one had come, at least he could say goodbye without restraint. Instead, he has to stand and pretend that he’s sad but still alright. He’s not alright. He’ll never be alright again._

_Sigyn and Sigurd are on separate funerary boats which are connected together while Nari and Vali share a single small one that follows behind. Loki wishes he could be anywhere else. They’re all too still and he can hardly breathe. It’s too much and it hurts. Finally, the arrows fall from the sky and fire catches on the boats. He turns to leave and Thor attempts to clasp his shoulder, wordlessly Loki shrugs him off, before returning to his chambers. Without Sigurd, forever. Alone, at last, Loki screams himself hoarse and sobs until no more tears will come. He swears to himself that this will be the last time he weeps like this._

Perhaps he deserved it, a price for his future sins. Loki scowls, no he’s being selfish- **they** had not deserved it, and if they hadn’t died he may not have gone down this path. Regardless it’s too late for him, he’d chosen to become the monster. He sees two Agents watching him warily, and he stares them down, the younger one breaks eye contact, but the elder holds his gaze seemingly unafraid. Sigurd had been just the same, ever fearless and loyal, he’d never cared what others thought about him. Loki wishes he could say the same, their first and worst fight had happened because of it.

_Loki crosses his arms glaring at Sigurd, while Sigurd stares back unabashed._

_“You’re a fool if you truly don’t care if they find out about us.”_

_“And you’re a fool if you’ll let that fear prevent you from being happy.”_

_“I’d rather be alive and miserable than dead and happy!”_

_“Then you’re an idiot. Why worry about something that can never happen and choose misery for a lifetime?!?”_

_It wasn’t the best time for an argument, sure they were relatively safe in their meadow, but they’d just woken up from a brief nap- after their first time having sex together. They’d fought and argued, the heat and discomfort likely fueling their tempers. They’d both said things that they didn’t mean and had been on the verge of splitting up, but thankfully had come to an understanding... and ended up having sex again._

Loki feels the ghost of a smile attempting to make itself known at the memory. In hindsight it was amusing, but he’d been oh-so-furious at the time. Sigurd had always teased him about their first fight. Well, that and the fact that a Prince of Asgard had been deflowered in a field. It wasn’t the best spot they could’ve picked- they were out in the open and there was little in ways of comfort, but they were young and full of lust and love, so the meadow where they’d first met had seemed as good a spot as any. Of course, after the second round, the smell of sex was rather obvious- so naturally, Sigurd thought pushing him into a pile of manure was the solution. To his credit, he’d flopped into it himself as well. As angry as he was at the time, Loki would give anything to go back to that moment. 

A small smile curls Loki’s lips as he remembers the limp he’d sported for the next few days. They really hadn’t known what they were doing, but they’d been enthusiastic about it. Sigurd had been much more prepared the next time and had brought some body oil to use as lubricant. That was actually how Sigyn had caught them- she’d noticed Sigurd’s constant thieving of said oil and had followed him to the meadow, from there she’d quickly guessed what had happened. Loki had been terrified but Sigurd had just chuckled and told him not to worry as Sigyn liked girls herself. She’d flushed and yelled at her brother but hadn’t denied the statement. From that point on, the three of them had been close. 

Having Sigyn as a friend and Sigurd as a lover had been something he would never have believed could happen, but it had. And when his body decided to remind him of his intersex nature by menstruating they both were by his side. Sigyn providing instructions and giving insight and Sigurd simply to comfort him. Sigyn had also slyly given him her birth control potions, saying that “she wouldn’t need it.” Loki misses her almost as much as Sigurd. And the twins- well they’d hardly begun to live and their deaths had been senseless. Loki feels rage overtake him for a moment before it dissipates. He barely has a moment to breathe before Stark walks up looking cagey.

“What do you want Stark?”

“Uhhh. I can’t believe I’m saying this but we need you-”

“You must be truly desperate to come to me for help. And on today of all days.”

“Ok, Thor said something to that effect, but he won’t tell me what’s wrong with today. Do you care to elaborate? Cuz I”m about to break you out of your cell and make SHIELD pissed so more information would be nice.”

Loki smiles faux sweetly, “I’d rather rip your heart out of your chest.”

Stark pauses at the controls before sighing, “I hope Thor knows what he’s doing.” He does something and alarms start going off on the other side of the facility and Loki watches bemused as Agents sprint that way.

“So, since you’re going on a field trip we need to put the magic canceling handcuffs on and your muzzle-”

“No.”

“Loki…”

“You want my help, I shan’t do a thing with a muzzle on.” His third-worst memory involves his mouth being restrained and he does not want to think about that, not today.

“Fuck. You’ll wear the handcuffs?”

“If I must.”

Stark presses a button and sends them into his cell and Loki grudgingly puts them on, curious about what exactly they want help with. “Ok, we’re going to Kansas.” At Loki’s blank stare he elaborates. “We’re visiting Barton.”

Loki raises an eyebrow, “Is this an attempt to have me killed?”

“What? No, his kid is sick and Thor said you could help.”

“I’m going to kill him,” Loki hisses. 

“Uhhh Thor or the kid.”

“Thor,” Loki huffs looking disgruntled.

“Ok, cool. Thor said you liked kids, but it still seems a bit risky taking a psychopath to the farm. Glad to hear you’re not that psychotic.”

  
Loki narrows his eyes, “You know **nothing** about me.”


	2. And so it begins

_ For as long as he could remember, Loki had always wanted children. Someone he could love and would love him back, that he could protect and raise as he saw fit. When he and Sigurd had fallen in love he’d resigned himself to the fact that he would never be a father. Then shortly afterward he’d begun to menstruate, a peculiar artifact of his shapeshifting nature, but one he’d never taken too seriously. Sigyn and Sigurd had been intrigued and agreed that the potential for pregnancy was there. So he’d resigned himself to taking birth control potions when he could. His access to them had been limited and his cycles were always so sporadic and irregular that eventually, he’d stopped taking them altogether. Sigurd had agreed, they so rarely had vaginal intercourse as Loki preferred his wholly male form to both his female and intersex one and Sigurd had little preference between them. _

_ Loki waits nervously for Sigurd, pacing back and forth in his chambers. It had been an accident and would complicate matters, but Loki can’t deny that he is happy (and terrified) that he finally has a chance to be a parent. Now, all that’s left is to inform Sigurd of the news and figure out what they’re going to do. Surely Sigurd won’t be angry with him, he should be happy to have an heir. Although he can’t recognize it as his own, will the child even know that Sigurd is his father? Loki’s pacing picks up speed, this is not something to think about now- _

_ “Loki.” _

_ The God of Mischief yelps in surprise as his lover's arms wrap around him. “Sigurd! You scared me.” _

_ “Hmm, what’s bothering you?” _

_ “Nothing,” Loki winces as he says it. It’s become a reflex to lie at this point but Sigurd is never fooled. _

_ He raises a brow, “Loki.” _

_ Loki nods steeling himself, he’d rehearsed the conversation enough times that he could recite it. Loki opens his mouth to begin but finds himself mesmerized by Sigurd’s beautiful eyes. “I’m pregnant,” he blurts out. Well, so much for subtlety. _

_ Sigurd stares at him obviously struggling to process the newest development, but the longer he goes without responding the more nervous Loki gets. Finally, Loki can’t bring himself to look anymore and tucks his head under Sigurd’s chin, nuzzling into him. That seems to snap Sigurd out of it. _

_ “Uhh that’s- that’s- I don’t know what to say.” _

_ “You’re not angry with me are you?” _

_ “Of course not! No, it’s not a bad thing, but how exactly are we going to pull this off? It’s going to be fairly obvious that Sigyn’s not pregnant.” _

_ Loki relaxes, “We’ll figure it out.” _

_ Sigurd’s eyes glaze slightly as they do when he’s lost in thought before he asks “How far along are you? Do you know if it’s a prince or a princess?” _

_ Loki laughs at Sigurd’s mounting excitement, “You should know the answer to the first. Remember you wanted something different for your birthday. As for the latter, I don’t know yet. There is a spell that will tell us but I’ve been waiting for you.” _

_ Sigurd gestures for him to go ahead and Loki begins to recite it. They wait in anticipation, Loki crosses his arms as he does when he’s nervous “It should happen fairly quickly- Red is for a boy and yellow for a girl.”  _

_ Sigurd merely nods. It takes a couple of minutes but then there’s an unmistakable red glow around Loki. Sigurd smiles blindingly at Loki and the God laughs breathlessly as the glow dissipates. He’s about to go in for a kiss when there’s another flash of red. Loki freezes, face paling and Sigurd tenses in worry “Is something wrong?” _

_ “I-I believe that means I’m carrying twins.” _

_ There’s a familiar smirk on Sigurd’s face as he teases Loki, “Are you sure there’s only two of them? You don’t think you can fit in a third or fourth?” _

_ “Shut up Sigurd!” _

_ Sigurd does, in fact, shut up, but only because he fucks Loki into a stupor- _

“Come on Reindeer Games, we haven’t got all day!”

Loki snaps back to the present with a sigh. Oh, he’s on the flying machine, when had that happened? Ehh probably not important-

Stark promptly snaps his fingers in Loki’s face. “Hey, no daydreaming!”

“Do that again and I will toss you out of this contraption.”

“You keep spacing out! Are you high? Your eyes keep glazing over-”

“Stark!” Thor booms shaking his head in an attempt to dissuade the man from continuing to pry. It doesn’t work.

“Ok what the hell is going on here? We’re stuck in a jet over the middle of the ocean with your psychotic brother. I don’t know whether to worry that he’s going to snap and kill us all or worry that he’s going to go into some sort of drug-fueled stupor and take us with him!”

Loki rolls his eyes, the mortal was incredibly dramatic. Yes, he’s perfectly aware of the hypocrisy. Perhaps telling the mortal the truth wouldn’t hurt, Stark had never seemed the type to use painful memories against an enemy, and he might even leave him alone. “Fine. It’s a depressing tale, a quadruple murder as you’d call it.”

“Well that’s not quite what I expected, but I’m listening.”

“Long ago I was married to a woman named Sigyn. No, don’t interrupt. She was a lovely Lady, her uncle was King Thrymir of Aflheim and his heir was his daughter Princess Nana. Sigyn had a twin brother- Sigurd. Sigurd was- he was….my dearest friend. Long story short, Sigyn and Sigurd were murdered during negotiations on Aflheim, and there was an attempted murder on the King and princess.”

“You said it was a quadruple murder.”

Loki curls his lip into a predatory smile, “Yes, my twin children were also murdered in their cribs. Happy?”

Stark for his part look horrified. “What the fuck?? Seriously, Loki what the fuck?”

Loki laughs, “Did you think the worst day of my life would be petty? I’m over 1000 years old. I’ve suffered in ways you couldn’t even imagine. I’m not in the best of spirits on this date and am plagued by memories. You and Thor have dragged me along to help you and are attempting to appeal to my matern- er- paternal instinct to save Barton’s child. So please, shut up and leave me alone.”

The rest of the ride to Barton’s farm is in silence, though Loki can still see Stark randomly mouthing ‘What the fuck’ to himself. Loki actually feels slightly better now that he’d spoken of what happened, had he ever told that story before? Probably not, most people already knew and those that didn't, well, why should they?

When they arrive he’s given a short lecture about behaving himself, before Stark goes off to try and tell Barton that they’d brought his worst enemy to his house. It’s clear Stark is still trying to process what he’d learned. Loki can hear Thor clumsily trying to compliment Barton which only serves to make the mortal even more suspicious, while Tony talks quickly and says they’ve found someone to help. It’s rather comical, the two grown men acting like children trying to explain why they’d broken a rule. Barton is evidently fed up and suspicious, because there’s a sound of approaching footsteps.

As always, Loki can’t control his mischievous nature and greets the archer with a “Ta-daa!”

Barton is on him almost immediately and actually gets a punch in, but Thor is prepared and drags him off of the younger god. Luckily Aesir's skin is thick and humans aren’t very strong or else Loki may have been tempted to hit him back. Barton struggles against Thor’s hold but is powerless to escape it.

Loki licks his lips enjoying the mounting chaos in the room, “I thought you wanted me to help your child? Honestly, I expected a more gracious welcome”

“You son of a bitch!”

Loki glares at him, a dagger appearing in his hand. He may not have entirely forgiven Frigga but he won’t allow a mortal to insult her.

“Loki!” Thor snaps, “Enough.”

“Go to Helheim, Thor. Actually, let me go there instead. At least it would be more entertaining than Midgard.”

Thor takes a deep breath “Loki, I know today is not a good day to ask this of you; you are upset and haunted by memories of the past, but Barton’s son needs your assistance.”

“No, today is the perfect day to ask for my assistance. Well, perfect for you, it’s not like any of you care about me.”

“You’re not going to touch my son,” Barton snarls at Loki.

Loki rolls his eyes, “Fine, let your child die because of your hatred. I’m not going to go out of my way to save a child that you clearly don’t want.” Loki feigns disinterest staring at his nails, it’s obvious what he’s doing but Loki knows it’ll work.

For his part, Barton looks incredibly torn as well as incredibly pissed off. “I don’t want a sadistic freak-”

He'd played nice long enough. Loki's eyes harden as he snaps, “Either let me help or let him die. I’m not in the mood to be insulted, I’d much rather be back in my cell.”

There's a moments hesitation before Barton wordlessly moves aside and Loki can’t help the smirk that leaps to his face. He turns to Stark who somehow had remained silent during the exchange and holds up his manacled hands . 

“Hell no, I’m not taking those off.”

“Then why did you bring me here? Did you honestly think I was going to fix the child without magic?”

“...If you try anything-”

Loki smiles smugly, “You’ll kill me? Go ahead.”

Stark stares at Loki as though he’s never seen him before, before removing the manacles from Loki’s wrists, “Ok, when we get back I’m getting you a therapist. You’ve got more issues than me and that’s saying something.”

Loki ignores him, looking at Barton expectantly. Reluctantly, the archer leads him to the room with his ailing son. As soon as he enters the room, alarm bells start going off in his head. Something is very wrong. He half expects Thor to crush him with Mjolnir but the three Avengers are watching him silently, the archer looks as though he's about to snap at any moment. His seidr runs over the child and he almost flinches, the wrongness is most concentrated there. “Poison.”

Stark frowns, “Did you say the kid was poisoned?”

“Yes, but there’s something I’m missing. Norns, it’s like it’s staring me right in the face but I can’t see it.”

“Can you cure him?” Barton asks, and for once the archer sounds subdued.

“No.”

Barton looks as though his world is falling apart, and despite their enmity, Loki can’t stand the soul-crushing expression. He knows all too well what it's like to lose one's children. Reluctantly he adds, “But I can draw the poison into myself. I should be able to withstand it.” And if I don’t, at least I’ll see my family again, Loki can’t help but think.

As he tries to siphon out the poison, he knows that things aren’t as they seem. It has a much stronger effect on him than they should, considering the child is still alive. Loki only hesitates for a second, his life isn’t very important anymore, the child would miss out on so much more. And maybe in saving the boy it would make up for his failure in protecting his own sons. The more he siphons, the weaker he becomes, and the others start to take notice. He's vaguely aware of Stark talking to him, and Thor tries to get his attention but Loki ignores them.

Finally, Thor grips his shoulder and shakes him. “Loki, you’re not well, you must stop.”

“I haven’t finished-”

“Stark says your heart rate is too erratic, you’re liable to drop dead before you finish!”

“ Then you’ll have double the reason to celebrate-”

There’s a small sound and they all pause for a second until they recognize it as a child’s cough. “Nate!” the archer says as he rushes to his son, cradling his head.

Loki steps away gracelessly and it’s only Thor’s quick reaction that keeps him from collapsing onto the floor. Loki shudders, his skin is clammy and he feels like he’s been hit in the head with Mjolnir a few times. His vision suddenly goes fuzzy and then everything goes black.

When Loki awakens, it’s with a gasp as he feels something sharp poke him. 

The first thing he sees is Stark’s smug face “I’m glad that worked because I didn’t have another idea. I took some blood samples and it is definitely poison, but not any that I can find a record of. Possibly extraterrestrial in origin. I don’t guess you have any ideas?”

“Not as to its origins, but from the start, this seemed like a trap for me. I could tell as soon as the poison entered my body that it was stronger for me than it was for the boy. That doesn’t seem like a coincidence. But as to how someone could’ve planned this, I’m unsure.”

“Hmmm. I’m gonna call someone, an old friend of mine. Well, more of an acquaintance, but a friendly one. He’s a genius with these sorts of things, so please cooperate with him.”

“If it’ll help find who’s targeting me, I’ll oblige your friend.”

“Great. Now promise me that no matter what he says you won’t kill him.”


	3. We meet again

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Past rape is hinted at. Also mild sexual content.

Loki has met many people over the centuries, but none have been quite like what Stark has described his acquaintance as. The man is supposedly a genius who keeps random body parts stashed around his house for experiments, and Loki can’t deny he’s curious about such a mortal (and utterly bored). He’d been left to awkwardly wait around while Barton doted over his newly recovered son (understandable), but Thor had left (probably to visit his mortal) which was rude, and Stark had wandered off to “take a call” from his own mortal. So if Loki was a bit more needy on the anniversary of his family’s deaths, well, who could blame him? 

Stark finally comes back and tells him the intriguing mortal, known as Sherlock Holmes was on his way. Loki had simply nodded, but he couldn’t deny the burst of anticipation. Then Stark’s device had made a horrible noise blathering about Avengers being needed. Loki wasn’t privy to the details, but his sense of hearing was much better than a mortal’s so he’d learned that something rather important was going on back in New York. After a brief discussion, they had very reluctantly left Loki on the farm-after snapping on the handcuffs that prevented his magic. Evidently, the Barton children had been told to avoid him, because Loki had not seen any of them. 

After waiting inside for several hours, Loki gets bored and wanders outside. There’s a decent amount of woodland, but also a nice big field, much like the meadow he loved, though less colorful. Finally, Loki hears a car arrive and waits with anticipation. The mortal doesn’t go through the house, instead of heading towards the area where Loki waits. The sun is bright overhead and temporarily blinds Loki as the mortal approaches, and then his face is out of the shadows and Loki feels his whole world come to a standstill.

“ **_Sigurd_ ** ”?!?! His voice shakes, but at the moment he doesn’t care.

The man gives him an odd look, brow furrowing just as Sigurd’s had when he was thinking. “Sherlock Holmes, consulting detective,” the mortal says as he offers his hand.

His voice is even the same as Sigurd’s! But this man doesn’t have Sigurd’s seidr, and he doesn’t seem to recognize him. Quickly, Loki takes his hand before the mortal draws away, suddenly needing to touch him.

The mortal lets out a yelp and Loki releases him immediately. Had he crushed his hand? Loki stares worriedly, of course, mortals are fragile. He should’ve paid more attention. Instead, he’d let his excitement get to him-

The mortal looks startled, “What- what was that?”

“... I beg your pardon?”

“I saw, or rather I remembered things. Things that haven’t happened to me. It was like I was-”

“Sigurd.”

Sherlock nods, “Yes.”

Loki’s voice shakes as he asks “What things did you see?”

“You mostly. My- his sister. He and you were lovers.”

Loki fidgets nervously, but nods. “I loved him more than anything. I’d have gladly died for him and he for me…” Loki glances up at the mortal and blanches, “I don’t know how to talk to you. You have Sigurd’s face and some of his memories, but… you are different aren’t you?”

Sherlock frowns, pondering the question, “I’m not Sigurd, well not entirely, but I’m not exactly myself anymore either… These memories are odd. It’s as though I’m living another life for the few seconds it takes.”

“I’m sorry. I- this is difficult for me as well. I want to- to hold you, to kiss you, to cry, to laugh, all those things at once but I know I can’t touch you and it’s incredibly painful.” Loki laughs bitterly, of course, this is what he deserves.

Sherlock stands, pondering his actions for a few seconds, his mind warring with itself. Eventually, he comes to a decision. Sherlock moves closer to the God and when Loki turns to look, Sherlock pulls him into a kiss. Loki freezes in shock momentarily before kissing back in a frenzy. His previous hesitation gone, Sherlock deepens the kiss. This was right, it doesn’t matter if he’s Sherlock or Sigurd, kissing Loki just feels natural. Loki makes a sound, that despite his incomplete memories is instantly recognizable-a small whimper that meant he was ready for more. Sherlock brings one hand up to cradle the back of Loki’s head while the other rests on his lower back, he’s careful to keep it up high enough. Loki had never liked his arse being touched, especially not after-

Abruptly Sherlock pulls away, making Loki yelp in surprise. Loki opens his mouth but quickly snaps it shut. The mortal looks angry, but he was the one who’d kissed him! “Is something wrong, Sigur- ....Sherlock?”

Sherlock scowls, “I remembered when you were kidnapped. And the aftermath.”

_ Loki clings to Sigurd, alternating between apologizing and dry-heaving. Sigurd stalks through the camp quickly, supporting Loki with one arm, eyes alert for signs stragglers from the group of masochist mercenaries that had held Loki captive for the past month. He’s killed four of their men already and would love to kill the rest of them as well. Unfortunately, Sigyn has done a perfect job of leading them away. Sigurd sighs as they leave, knowing that he won’t have an opportunity to find the group again, but Loki can barely walk and is utterly terrified so he does his best to not let his annoyance show. None of this was Loki’s fault. It’s the mercenaries’ fault for choosing to harm Loki, Asgard’s fault for not sending out search parties when he’d first disappeared and ignoring the ransom notice, and Sigurd’s fault for not finding him faster. Loki, however, seems to under the impression that he’s at fault, and Sigurd knows he should correct him, but hearing Loki apologize just makes him angrier with himself and the brutes who hurt him. _

_ Loki makes an odd hiccuping-sob sound, and what little heart Sigurd has hurts. His poor Loki. Sigurd turns his head and tries to give a gentle kiss to Loki. Loki pulls away and Sigurd winces, in hindsight that hadn’t been a good idea…. _

_ “Why in Helheim would you do that? Can’t you see how disgusting I am?!?” _

_ Sigurd frowns, it’s true that Loki is caked in grime and filth of various natures and he doesn’t smell the best at the moment, but he’s rather afraid that that’s not what Loki had been referring to. “Well you might not be quite as clean as normal, but you looked like you could use it.” _

_ Loki gives him a look and then huffs, turning away from Sigurd and looking off into the distance. “Don’t pretend you’re not disgusted by me.” _

_ “I’m not! I love you. I’m disgusted with myself for letting you get into this situation, for not finding you in time, for not knowing how to help you.” _

_ Loki glances back at Sigurd, tears in his eyes, hoping with all his heart that he’s telling the truth. Sigurd’s expression is fierce, and his beautiful eyes are full of love and anger and pain. Loki throws himself into Sigurd’s arms, making the young lord stumble backward before wrapping his arms around his prince. _

Loki winces, “I was rather hoping you’d forget about that.”

Sherlock scoffs, “Why? That was my biggest failure I need to remember to know to avoid making the same mistakes. Besides it’s rather important for me to remember, I don’t want to accidentally hurt you.”

“Sig- Sherlock, that was many centuries ago. Is it something I like thinking about? Of course not, but it doesn’t tear me up inside like it used to. We made wonderful memories together, those are more worth my time.”

Sherlock inclined his head in understanding. Suddenly a thought pops into his head, “Loki, how are the twins?”

Loki’s face pales. “Fuck. Fuck! Of course, you wouldn’t know. They died, Sherlock. They didn’t get a chance to grow up. I lost them when I lost you and Sigyn.”

“You’ve been alone all this time?”

“You have no idea. It’s killed me, I’m not the man you remember.” Loki closes his eyes, pain evident on his face. “I’ve done horrible things, I’m not the innocent boy you knew.”

“You’re still my Loki.”

Loki smiles softly and opens his mouth to speak, but Sherlock silences him with a kiss. Loki kisses him with all the feeling he can muster and before long he’s being pushed onto the floor. Loki breaks away and glances around. “Well, I guess a forest will do, seeing as there are no meadows.”

Sherlock chuckles in amusement, old muscle memory helps him remove the clasps and buckles of Loki’s armor. Loki hums “You’ve always been better at that than I have.”

Loki had always been very talkative when he was excited, or nervous, actually, any strong emotion made Loki talkative. Some things never changed. Sherlock finally manages to get the armor off of Loki and his tunic soon follows. The detective can’t help but stare at the muscular chest that greets him, “That is certainly different.”

Loki laughs, “I was pretty lanky in my youth. Norns I’d almost forgotten.”

“You’re still pretty.”

“You say such sweet things,” Loki grins mischievously and the rest of their clothing vanishes.

“You always were impatient.”

Loki quirks a brow, “No you were the patient one, and I was the one begging you to hurry up and fuck me. Clearly that hasn’t changed. It’s been centuries, I think I’ve waited long enough, so please fuck me already.”

Sherlock considers Loki’s words, it is tempting to make him wait- Loki narrows his eyes at him clearly picking up on his line of thought. The trickster spreads his legs further apart as if to drive the point home. Decisions. if he makes Loki wait he’ll be grumpy but very satisfied afterward, and will likely sleep hard. If he gives in Loki will be pleased and much more likely for a repeat performance but will likely make smug remarks. Well, it was never any contest.


	4. Chapter 4

Loki glares daggers at the mortal. The nerve of him. He looks so damn smug. Centuries of waiting and the mortal had the nerve to make him wait until he was so strung out he could barely speak. Loki huffs, “Let’s see if I let you fuck me again.”

Sherlock just chuckles, “I thought you’d be over it after you slept.”

“I’m very good at holding grudges… and this was a horrible spot to sleep. Our meadow was much softer.”

There’s an amused smirk on the detective’s face, “Middle age has caught up to you.”

Loki scoffs, “I am not middle-aged. If you would care to recall, you ‘knocked me up’ with twins, which did all sorts of awful things to my back. It’s never been quite the same.”

That was right, Loki had had horrible back pain in the months leading up to the birth of the twins. As Sigurd, he’d given many massages to try and soothe the aches and generally it had helped the trickster. Or at the very least it had taken his mind off of it. Sherlock moves closer to Loki, rubbing his back in an effort to soothe it as he had all those years ago. 

Loki makes a noise of complaint and moves away. “Ahhh not right now, that’s going to get us right back where we were, and I don’t care to spend another night out here. Norns, I’m like an adolescent with his first crush.”

“That’s how I remember you.”

“As an adolescent with a crush or constantly horny?”

“Both if I’m being perfectly honest.”

Loki can’t help himself, he giggles at that. The situations he’d gotten them into… “Do you remember Gran Soren?”

That definitely rings some bells. It takes a minute but Sherlock gets there. “Yes! We were nearly caught and hanged.”

“How was I supposed to know it was a temple we were desecrating? It certainly looked like abandoned ruins.”

Sherlock chuckles lowly and before they know it they’re both laughing. They laugh until they’re out of breath and then dissolve into little fits of giggles. “You were absolutely incorrigible. We’re lucky they didn’t catch us. It wouldn't have gone well for us as diplomats.”

“Sigyn almost killed us! She had it easy. No one cared that she was constantly with Fulla, but you and I being alone together? Well, that made everyone antsy.”

“That was because they were afraid of me helping with your tricks. They didn’t really suspect we were together- everyone thought Sigyn and I were having some sort of secret incestual affair.”

“Well, Nari did bear a strong resemblance to you.”

Sherlock rolls his eyes, “As far as they were concerned I was his uncle. It would be odd if we didn’t look alike.”

Loki sighs, “I wish we could’ve told people about us. It always hurt that you couldn’t claim the twins.”

Sherlock shrugs, “It didn’t bother me. I knew the truth. It is odd to think that I had children though. A day ago I was certain I’d never have them, now I know I had two.”

Loki turns away, eyes focused far away. “Three.”

_ Loki leans against the wall of his balcony, staring blankly at the Bifrost. It’s been two months since he lost his family and life seems to be at a complete standstill. He’s been relieved of his duties as a prince to allow him time to mourn. In a way it’s nice, but he’d almost prefer being busy to being left to sit and wait for each day to pass. And for what? It’s as though he’s simply waiting to die. Still, the Bifrost is a captivating distraction, beautiful as it is, he often finds himself watching it as it’s nice to simply watch the ever-changing colors. A wave of nausea hits him and he resists the urge to scream. His body has taken to tormenting him, Eir had said it was an artifact of his sorrow, that his mind was causing his body pain. He really wishes it would stop. There’s a little flutter of movement in his stomach and Loki pauses. Surely that’s not… One spell and two mental breakdowns later, and Loki confirms that he’s pregnant. He’s not sure whether to sob or scream or cheer but he does his best to calm himself.  _

_ He worries over his unborn a great deal. He hadn’t been taking care of himself, he’d grown weak and skinny and was certainly not in the best mental state. And how is he going to explain the child? Over the coming months, he makes many plans but none of them seem to stick. Eventually, he decides to just see what happens. He knows the birth is coming when he feels the child shift and then there’s a tightness in his belly that’s unmistakable. He’s prepared as well as he can be to deliver by himself, as using a healer would bring too many questions. The birth goes smoothly on his end and Loki is rather proud of how he managed on his own. Until he realizes that his baby isn’t crying. He tries and tries to clear the lungs, to somehow make the child breathe, but his efforts are fruitless and at last, he crumples to the floor and sobs silently. He’d failed again. He was a horrible parent and his refusal to seek help had cost his child their life. He didn’t deserve Sigurd, he never had. _

“What?”   
  


Loki forces a smile onto his face but it’s clearly pained, “I was pregnant when you died. The baby was- he was stillborn. Evidently, I had to fail you one last time.”

Sherlock stares, why did everything always seem to go wrong for Loki? “Loki, it wasn’t your fault. You were all alone, and I know you did everything you could.”

Loki opens his mouth to protest but snaps it shut. There are sounds coming from Barton's house. “We need to go back, or the  _ Avengers _ are going to come looking for us. I’d rather not be blamed for trying to escape or kidnap you.”

Sherlock nods and the duo quickly make their way back. As they get close it becomes clear that something is wrong- the voices do not belong to any of the Avengers. Loki almost tells Sherlock to stay hidden and wait, but he knows it’s a waste of breath. Instead, Loki takes the lead and they edge forward. Suddenly, Loki stiffens and Sherlock tries his best to see- and then he spots exactly what set Loki off. There is a man patrolling the outside of Barton’s house, he’s tall and his armor and weapon make it clear he’s not from Earth, but the colors and style of the armor is familiar. It’s the same as the mercenaries that kidnapped Loki all those years ago. Sherlock only has a split second to process the fact because the man drops dead from Loki’s dagger almost instantaneously. Loki moves on without a word, but he’s clearly shaken. All in all, there are five mercenaries outside of the house and Loki silently kills the other four as efficiently as he did the first. It could almost be intimidating, but Sherlock knows he has no need to fear Loki, instead, he feels rather useless simply watching. As Sigurd, he could’ve taken on the mercenaries all together and come out victorious- he hadn’t been exceptionally talented but his sword had been magnificent.

“What happened to Tyrfing?”

Wordlessly Loki conjures his pocket dimension and removes the sword- it’s every bit as fiery as he remembered. Tyrfing the unbeatable sword of flames, it was famed for being able to cut through anything. Loki had crafted it himself- the only weapon Loki had ever made and it could rival Mjolnir in its power. Thor had not been pleased when Loki had crafted such a magnificent weapon and gifted it to Sigurd over him. In truth it had been partly because it was so magically costly and time-intensive to craft else he’d have made more weapons, but the work it had taken to make the single sword had convinced Loki to never do so again. The other issue was that somehow crafting the sword had seemed rather intimate, there was something about imbuing the sword with his own magic that was far too personal.

Sherlock takes it from Loki examining it- it’s exactly as he remembers.“They said it was unbeatable, but I suppose they didn’t exactly fight me, simply stabbed me from behind. A clever workaround really.”

Loki draws in a sharp breath and stalks towards the entrance to the house, unwillingly to think of the events of Sigurd’s death. Sherlock follows dutifully, Tyrfing securely in his grasp. Loki moves silently and listens intently trying to figure out where everyone is. He finds two more mercenaries waiting just inside and with Sherlock as a distraction disposes of both swiftly. Loki stalks up a set of stairs towards a room where he can hear children’s voices, he finds Barton’s two sons inside scared but unharmed. Loki’s eyes dart around the room frantically checking for anything amiss before settling back on the children. “Stay here and hide. Only emerge if you must.”

Sherlock’s presence helps ground Loki, but even with the man beside him, Loki can’t help the feeling of nausea. Where is Barton’s daughter? He’s afraid to find her, he’s afraid to not find her, and he’s definitely afraid of what else may lie in wait. How long have the mercenaries occupied Barton’s residence? It can’t have been more than 12 hours. He glances at Sherlock who looks focused and unafraid. “Sherlock, I know you’re going to want to follow, but please wait for me to assess the situation before showing yourself.”

Loki doesn’t wait for a reply but doesn't immediately hear footsteps behind him so he figures the detective had for once complied. He finds a room that he can hear voices from and takes a deep breath before throwing it open. Barton’s daughter is there and though she looks uncomfortable she doesn’t appear to be hurt. The red-haired man wielding a great axe next to her is another story, Loki instantly recognizes him and it’s all he can do to keep calm.

Loki smirks, “Have you gone through all this trouble just for me?”

The man smiles, but it's predatory, “Of course, my client is very interested in you. You’re one of a kind.”

That does not sound promising. Loki quirks a brow, “I suppose there is only one God of Lies and Mischief.” Loki stalks closer to the man, trying to get in between him and the girl.

That draws a cruel laugh from the man, “You don’t even know what you are do you?” 

Loki bristles, “I’m aware that I’m a Jotun runt that was abandoned at birth. Why should that matter to your  _ client _ ?” A few more steps and he can pull her behind him.

“You don’t know then. You’re a  _ female _ Jotun and those are very rare. You’re the only one alive in fact.”

“I am  **not** a woman!” Loki snaps. So much for keeping calm. “You must be an idiot as well as a monster.”

“You’re supposed to be smart. Look at you, you’ve never been a real man, even the simple-minded Asgardians knew that much. They didn’t know the truth, probably didn’t want to know. Those pretty little kids of yours didn’t come from Sigyn’s womb, they came from yours. You think because you look like a man you are one? You’re a broodmare and there’s a bunch of people who’d pay for that alone, but female Jotun are special. They’re more powerful, unfortunately, they’re rare and tend to only bond to a single mate, but that mate is said to gain unique abilities. Our client is very interested in that.”

Loki tenses, what he’s implying…. well it certainly does not bode well for him. “You intend to gift me to your client as a whore for him to use? I’m sorry but I won’t let that happen.”

The man laughs at that. “Really? You think you can stop me. You were pathetic the last time we caught you. Although you were very _ entertaining _ .”

“I was an adolescent!” Loki snarls “You and your band of criminals were impossible for me to fend off. I was helpless and you decided to take advantage of the fact!”

“We offered you to Odin but he didn’t seem to care to pay for your safe return. Our client had his suspicions and encouraged us to do as we’d like. It didn’t confirm his suspicions then but the rumors surrounding your offspring did. Then, of course, your reaction to the deaths of your family solidified it.”

Loki’s muscles are taught ready to leap into action at any moment, “Are you saying my family was killed to test me?!?”

“Well, we had to get your master out of the way, if we had any chance of getting you to bond to our client. Sigyn was just an added bonus. A shame about the offspring, they looked like they’d be just as pretty as you, but we thought it would be easier without them.”

Loki launches himself at the man, not caring to plan, only wanting to kill. Loki is blinded by rage and is knocked aside by a powerful kick. The man is stronger than him but is weakened by the fact that he needs Loki alive, and Loki isn’t afraid of death or pain. Loki picks himself off the ground and lunges again, only to be side-stepped and knocked back down. He lets out a huff as the wind is knocked out of his lungs. An axe swings towards him but is stopped by an arc of flames. Loki looks up to find Sherlock, rage evident in his face, attempting to fight off the much stronger and more seasoned mercenary.  _ That idiot is going to get himself killed. _

The red-head looks momentarily stunned, before his face twists in the facsimile of a smile, “You were supposed to be dead… unless… oh, that rumor is true. The little Jotun slut brought his master back from the dead.”

Sherlock’s face hardens at the words, “No one owns Loki, least of all me.”

Despite the precarious situation, Loki wonders at those words, he had nothing to do with Sigurd’s reappearance as Sherlock. Perhaps the red-haired man was mistaken about everything. Not that it matters at the moment, at present, he has to save his precocious lover from another untimely death. As the man lunges toward Sherlock, Loki pushes himself to his feet and rushes towards the man dagger in hand, only to be forced to jump backwards to avoid the path of the axe. “Damn!”

Sherlock slashes with Tyrfing, flames spewing and forces the man backwards, simultaneously Loki lunges again this time his dagger buries itself into the man’s neck and Loki pulls it across as hard as he can. There’s a sick gargle of blood as the man laughs, “They’ll find you.” The words are concerning, but for now, Loki pays them no mind.

Loki’s only answer is another dagger in the throat. He’s vaguely aware of Sherlock speaking, but he doesn’t hear the words. The next thing he knows he’s panting in a pool of blood, the corpse looking decidedly less… intact than before. Sherlock and the girl are no longer in sight. Suddenly, Loki feels nervous. Had he terrified them and made them flee? Would Sherlock not want to be with him now? Loki suddenly feels weak. He stumbles out of the room and walks mindlessly in search of his mortal.


	5. Humanity

Sherlock is standing in the Barton’s kitchen awkwardly attempting to cook while the three children sit together at the table watching silently- evidently the events of the day had taken a toll on them. Loki can’t help the little flutter of love he feels watching the other man. Sigurd had never been particularly talented in cooking, often getting distracted in the process, though he’d been far more skilled than Sigyn who for the life of her could not follow a recipe, but he’d tried several times to cook for him and though the results had never been spectacular it had always made Loki happy to have such a caring lover. But it’s bittersweet, because the three children aren’t  _ theirs  _ and he knows that they’ll never get to experience this with their own offspring.

Loki takes a breath to calm himself then asks, “Do you need help?”

Sherlock’s head whips towards him and Loki almost laughs at the look of relief on his face as he thrusts a utensil at him, clearly glad to foist the cooking onto someone else. Accepting the proffered item, Loki frowns at it, not entirely sure how it’s used.

The mortal senses his confusion and demonstrates quickly before passing it back to Loki, making it quite clear that he has no desire to work with it. In the end Loki does things his own way. He’s not entirely sure what meat he’s using or what spices, but the smell is the important part- it's the way he’s always cooked much to Sigurd and Sigyn’s chagrin. He rummages around until he finds some sort of vegetables and throws them in with the meat. It takes a while, but eventually he deems the meal to be edible. He’s not certain about human dining, but he finds platters that seem to be intended for food and goes about loading them. It’s likely overkill but he’d much rather everyone have too much than not enough; especially the children who are growing. 

Loki passes the platters to the others, sitting himself at the table and waiting for them to eat. The two elder children hesitate, seemingly uncertain but Sherlock and the youngest immediately start eating, and so they reluctantly do so as well. Now that everyone is taken care of Loki feels a wave of relief wash over him.

“Loki, eat,” Sherlock urges, looking intently at the god.

He’s loath to do so, but he knows the tone is one that brokes no arguments so reluctantly he takes a small bite. The taste is fair, but he has little desire to eat. He manages a little bit more before stopping, hoping that his lover will be satisfied. Sherlock doesn’t comment on it, but Loki’s fairly certain he’ll hear about it later. For some reason, after growing into adulthood, his appetite had all but vanished and as a consequence when busy or stressed he’d forgo meals, particularly after the birth of the twins.. It had been fine for a while, until Sigurd had been assigned to diplomatic duty in Vanaheim for a few months. Between lactating and skipping meals, he’d quickly lost weight, though he hadn’t noticed at the time. Sigurd had been furious when he’d returned and saw how bony Loki had become. It had brought back too many bad memories of the last time Loki had been so skinny; made worse by the fact that no one else seemed to have cared enough to ask about it. Since that day, Sigurd had been very attentive to Loki’s eating habits, and evidently Sherlock had remained the same.

The rest of the meal is uneventful and as the children relax they start talking more about their lives, particularly the youngest two. Without entirely understanding, he becomes part of a very heated debate between the two brothers over some kind of game they had been playing and does his best to calm them both. The rest of the meal is far more civilized and the youngest, Nate, seems to take a liking to Loki.

The boy looks up at looking, eyes wide in wonder and Loki feels his heart melt. The child is adorable, even if he is Barton’s. “You have a question?” Loki asks softly.

The boy furrows his brow clearly serious and asks, “Are you a princess? You seem fancy and you look pretty.”

Lila starts to scold her youngest sibling, while the middle child, Cooper laughs, Sherlock just smiles clearly amused. “Well, in a way I suppose I am.” As an intersex shapeshifter he’d never been too picky about his gender, and though he tended to prefer his male form he didn’t use it exlcusively. The subject was probably too difficult to explain to the young ones but they’re all staring at him curiously so he feels compelled to elaborate.

“I can shapeshift, I prefer being male but I’m not always.”

Cooper and Lila look stunned and confused, but the youngest grins, runs out of the room and then comes back in, profering something to Loki. “You have to wear this!”

Loki accepts it, staring at it in bewilderment, “It’s very floral.”

“It goes on your head! It’s a flower crown!”

Loki nods as though it makes perfect sense and places it neatly on his head. Humans are perplexing.

The youngest claps and is clearly pleased with himself. Lila seems surprised, but Loki isn’t exactly shocked. Barton hated him and would’ve told his eldest at least that much. Afterwards, she helps him clean though he assures her he can do it himself. She insists and Loki doesn’t want to argue. Sherlock seems to pick up on something because he makes himself and the youngest two scarce. 

Finally, she breaks their silence, “Do you hate my dad?”

Loki pauses, considering the question. “I certainly don’t like him, but hate? No, I don’t feel that strongly.”

She accepts that and considers her next question while Loki waits patiently. “Why are you being nice to us? Dad made it seem like you were…. evil.”

“I’m a complicated person and I’ve been alive a very long time. I do, however, like children and have no desire to harm you or your siblings.”

She takes offense to that, “I’m not a kid!”

“Mmm perhaps not. But you’re not an adult either. I’ve lived many centuries, even your father is like a child compared to me.”

Lila frowns, “But you and Sherlock are together aren’t you?”

It takes a few seconds for Loki to finally answer. It’s been so ingrained to deny any involvement that it’s difficult for him to admit. “We are, but it’s different. He- he’s my lover who died, somehow reborn.”

“That sounds insane.,” Lila says with a sigh, “But so does everything else that’s been happening. Like that crazy man that appeared out of nowhere.”

Loki tenses at the mention. “He- he didn’t hurt you did he?”

“No, he was very creepy and made me uncomfortable but he didn’t actually do anything.”

He lets out a sigh of relief, “Thank the Norns.”

Lila eyes him intently, “Can I ask you something?”

She looks earnest, but hesitant and Loki can’t help but agree. “Alright…”

“The things he said, were they true?”

Loki takes a deep breath, “Some of them.,” He fiddles with his hands nervously, “Can you be more specific.”

“Did you really... give birth?”

“I- Well,” Loki can’t help the fear in his voice, it’s a sensitive subject. One that had been very closely guarded.

She seems sympathetic, “I promise I won’t tell Dad. It’s not something he needs to know.”

“Yes, I did.” Loki is surprised at her reaction. He'd been expecting… something. Her laughing, mocking, anything other than the calm acceptance. Then again many of Midgard’s youths seemed to be more open and accepting than the elders. “Why did you want to know?”

She gazes up at him searchingly,“If I tell you or ask you something are you going to tell my Dad?”

Loki considers it, “Not unless I think you’re in danger.” He doesn’t owe anything to Barton, and save for the child being at risk he’d rather stay out of familial affairs.

She glances at him searchingly, seemingly hesitant. Evidently she steels herself and asks, “ My boyfriend has been badgering me to have sex with him for a long time, but I’m not sure I want to actually do it yet. Is it as big of a deal as everyone says?”

The god inhales sharply, he needs a drink. Sherlock would’ve been far better at this, could’ve explained things clinically with no shame, but of course he’d gotten himself out of it. Still, he’s compelled to answer, if only because he knows it’s better to hear the truth from an adult rather than rumors from other children. And he remembers himself at about her age, he and Sigurd had gone in completely blind and had quite a few fumbles in the bedroom that could easily have been avoided with a little knowledge. “It can be. It shouldn’t physically hurt if things are taken slowly and done properly, but there can be a small amount of pain and discomfort. Especially the first time when you aren’t entirely sure what you’re doing. Mentally on the other hand, it really depends on the situation and how you feel about it and your partner. That said you shouldn’t be pressured into doing something. I’m not your parent, but I can tell you from experience that a good lover respects your needs and wishes and never makes you do something just because they want to.”

“He said if I loved him, I’d want to make him happy.”

Loki scowls, “That’s very manipulative. You should make the decision because you want to, not because you feel forced to. If he truly loved you he’d respect your decision not try and make you change it. When I was young I wanted to do everything to please my Sigurd, I cared little for myself and valued him more than anything. I offered myself to him, long before I was really ready, just because I thought I should. He loved me enough to stop me, and instead made me understand that he cared for me and wanted me happy more than anything else.”

She looks distant for a few seconds before she gives a watery smile,“Dad did always say Bryan was an asshole.”

He can’t argue with that. “I’m not often inclined to agree with your father, but on this I concur.”

“I guess I’ll finally dump his ass…I knew he had issues but I thought that he loved me despite them. Dad will be thrilled. How old were you when…?”

“Hmm, probably fairly close to your age.,” Loki says trying to figure out how exactly it measures up, “It’s hard for me to compare, but we were adolescents.”

She sighs, tears still in her eyes, “You found your soul mate before you were even an adult. How do I do that? How did you do that?”

Loki can’t help but sympathize with her, he’d gotten incredibly lucky. “Believe it or not, I met his twin sister first. I liked her, she was kind, and she was nobility. So naturally, my adolescent brain decided that I should marry her before I was made to marry someone else whom I’d hate. I was going to ask her brother for permission to begin courting her, but then I met Sigurd and well…”

_ Loki stares at the young lord, captivated. It doesn’t take long before he’s enthralled with the man, having completely forgotten his original purpose. His voice, his quick wit, his handsome visage, Loki is helplessly smitten and utterly terrified because of it. What would father think? Thor? Mother? Well...Father and Thor would be absolutely furious and mother would be so disappointed in him. The thought of his mother temporarily dampens his spirit but the elder boy smiles at him and any hope of resisting is gone. Loki moves out of Thor’s shadow and becomes Sigurd’s instead, following him like a faithful hound does his master. The young lord isn’t as well-loved as Thor by any means, but he’s known to be a capable swordsman and so is respected by the Aesir. It’s a bit of a curiosity to both Aflheim and Asgard how the two boys, who were known to be loners who scorned the company of others became so closely attached. Thor is less than pleased to have lost his brother’s companionship for hunts and quests, though he’d paid little attention to him then, favoring the warriors three and Sif, so Loki isn’t inclined to care. _

_ It’s almost embarrassing how quickly he falls for Sigurd, but the feeling seems to be mutual. The way Sigurd gazes at him and protects him from the others who would mock him, combined with the fact that Sigurd so rarely deigns to grace others with his presence but will spend hours everyday with him, well, surely that means something. The problem is, that while he suspects there’s something more between them than friendship, he isn’t  _ **_certain._ ** _ It terrifies him to think that he could be wrong, and then what? Best case scenario is that Sigurd rejects his affections and distances himself, damaging their friendship in the process. The worst case, well, Sigurd could be disgusted and furious, demand Loki not talk to him again, tell others, and then Loki would be in real trouble. He doesn’t think Sigurd would do it, but the niggling uncertainty steals his tongue. He spends months trying to convince himself to put his silvertongue to good use, and then it takes much longer to try and work up the courage to actually say something. He tries several times, but always gets tongue-tied. _

_ Needless to say nothing happens until Sigurd pulls him onto his lap one day and kisses him chastely on the lips. It takes Loki several seconds to process and when he does Sigurd looks confused. _

_ “Not good? I thought this was what you wanted.” _

_ “What? No! I was just surprised, I wasn’t sure that you were interested. I thought you were but I kept panicking. I was afraid you wouldn’t feel the same. Uhh I- well- I- I love you.” _

_ Loki blanches even as he says the words, but Sigurd doesn’t seem to mind, instead looking thoughtful. _

_ “I’m not very good with sentiment, but I do know that I feel strongly for you. I enjoy spending time with you and want to protect you. So, I believe I love you too.” _

  
  
  



	6. Do you believe in magic

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm back. Didn't leave or forget this fic, but have been a bit busy. Actually, I've been working on a new Sherloki fic which I haven't published yet but likely will soon.

“We were both incredibly lucky. I don’t know what I’d have done without him, I was never well-liked, I was actually barely tolerated because I was… different for lack of a better description. Well, you know more about me now than they did, you can imagine how a bunch of hot-headed warriors who are obsessed with honor and other ‘masculine pursuits’ viewed me.”

“They sound like a bunch of asshats.”

Loki smirks in amusement, “You mortals certainly are creative with your insults. They tended to stick to Argr for everything, it is a fairly flexible word in fairness.”

There’s a sudden shout and Loki leaps to his feet and races towards the sound. He finds three more mercenaries, which Sherlock has successfully batted back with Tyrfing. Loki snarls and charges at the one nearest to him, neatly slitting his throat before stabbing the next in the heart. The last one disappears in a flash before Loki has a chance to get to him. “Damn!”

Sherlock sighs, “That was unfortunate. They’ll be back before long, once our ‘friend’ tells the rest of his company where we are.”

Loki glances at the children with a frown and then turns to Sherlock. They share a knowing look.

Layla notices, “We’re going to have to leave aren’t we?”

“Correct. They’re after Loki so we technically could leave you and your siblings, but based on prior experience it’s unlikely they’d simply let you go unscathed.”

She nods, “Cooper, Nate, go pack some clothes and grab your emergency go bags. Meet here in 10 minutes.” The three of them take off inside, leaving the two adults alone.

Loki is clearly distressed, he paces anxiously while fiddling with his hands. “Sherlock, is there somewhere we can take them that’s safe?”

The detective shrugs, “We’re up against people who can teleport, I’ve no idea how they found us or how far they can go. Unfortunately, despite my power of deduction massively increasing since I was Sigurd, my understanding of magic is still very limited, that’s your area of expertise. They’ll know you care about the children and they have no moral code so it’s likely they’d be used against you. ”

“Norns help us. I don’t know what spell they’re using or if it’s even a spell it could be an enchanted object or simply technology from a faraway realm. How in Helheim are we to avoid them?”

“Well if it was a normal human problem, the first thing to do would be to wear a disguise and try and get as far away as possible without being tracked. Though with magic in play it won't be half as easy as normal. I don’t suppose Baldr and Hodr would be willing to help?”

“They died as well, a few centuries after you but I only saw them a handful of times after your death. Baldr wanted to marry your cousin Nanna so badly and Odin forbade him and refused to give his blessing that eventually he just left Asgard, Hodr of course went with him. They came for the funeral, a few days late but they paid their respects all the same. Hodr even let me cry and held me like he would when I was young and Baldr comforted me and never insulted me for my tears, actually I think he shed a few himself. I never learned what exactly happened to them but I miss them greatly.”

Sherlock nods, “I liked them as well. I believe they suspected us of being a couple, but if anything they were encouraging.”

Loki smiles softly, “That doesn’t surprise me. Hodr especially was very astute, perhaps to compensate for his blindness, and Baldr was always very sweet to me.”

_Loki walks down the corridors swiftly, intent on his goal while Baldr follows closely behind looking amused with his younger brother’s determination. Loki was very focused for one so young, a stark contrast to Thor who changed his mind as swiftly as the wind. After turning down a familiar set of corridors, they arrive at their parents' chambers and Loki stalks in unconcerned as Baldr hurries after him, unwilling to let him out of sight for too long._

_Odin and Frigga had gone to visit Frigga’s family on Vanaheim and had taken Thor with them, while Loki had been deemed too young for travel by Bifrost and left behind under the supervision of the twins. Neither had really minded as both had a soft spot for the littlest prince who was generally well-behaved and easy to care for. More so now than as a toddler at least- it was very difficult to keep track of a shape-shifting, magically talented infant with a penchant for both teleporting and taking on the appearance of random people he saw. One moment he would be a normal black-haired green-eyed babe and the next a red-haired brown-eyed girl, and to make things worse he’d keep his borrowed appearance for anywhere from a half-hour to several days. Baldr had grown_ **_very_ ** _familiar with Sif’s parents after multiple incidents with swapping the children. It had been a very real problem until Loki had eventually grown out of it._

_As it was, Baldr was still a bit apprehensive of leaving his youngest sibling on his own, despite the fact that their parents let him wander as he liked, so he tailed the little one often enough that he’d been called a mother-hen. Loki pauses in front of their mother's vanity and looks at Baldr expectantly, the handle is too high for the boy to reach, though Baldr doesn’t doubt that he could find a way to open it. Immediately, after it’s opened Loki rifles around through it which does nothing to calm Baldr’s nerves. Loki pulls at one of mother’s dresses and Baldr is about to scold him for tugging at it, when it falls down and Loki pulls it over his head. It’s far too big for him, and it looks a little ridiculous, but Loki is clearly happy so he doesn’t say a word. He does however warn the littlest Odinson to be very careful to not allow others to see what he does, the boy doesn’t entirely understand why, but does understand the urgency in his brother’s voice and seems to yield, much to the elder’s relief. Father would not have been understanding, nor would the rest of the Aesir._

They didn't speak of the incident for many centuries until Baldr visited Asgard when Loki is an adolescent constantly scampering after Sigurd. Baldr had been surprised when he’d met the young lord of Aflheim whom his brother shadowed intently. He’d asked Loki questions about Sigurd, clearly protective and Loki had taken it simply as his mother-hen nature, now, however, he wonders if Baldr had been trying to ensure Loki was being respected. Eventually, he’d been satisfied and had offered Loki a gift looking awkward as he did so, which was very out of character.

_“This is for you if you want it. I saw it and it reminded me of you, but I don’t want you to be upset with me for getting it.”_

_Loki arches a brow, “What gift could you have procured that would upset me, so?”_

_Baldr shrugs, “I don’t know that it will. It would Thor, but I’d never give it to him.”_

_Loki pries the box open and is met with a gorgeous emerald and gold dress. He glances up at Baldr trying his best to keep his face blank and is met with his brother who’s doing the same. They stare at one another for a while before Baldr sighs, “Loki I won’t be mad at you either way. Either you like it and are happy with it or you don’t like it and that’s okay too. I just remember how happy you were as a kid, and I thought maybe you’d still like it.”_

_“It’s not very masculine,” Loki says, testing the waters._

_“You’re a shapeshifter, you don’t need to always be masculine, at least not with me.”_

_Loki’s eyes soften, and he inclines his head, “Thank you.”_

_They don’t say anything more on the subject, but Loki’s acceptance of the gift is evident._

“You know Baldr gave me the dress that I wore that time in Gran Soren.”

Sherlock chuckles, “He had excellent taste.”

“Do you think shifting would help?”

Sherlock shrugs, “Your call.” He knows what Loki is really asking is whether or not he’d like him in his female form, but he’s always loved Loki in any form.

Loki nods, there’s a shimmer of green and then Loki is in his female form, and reluctantly trades her armor for a light blue dress. She hesitates for a moment before applying an illusion to change her hair red and eyes blue. She fidgets with her hair, trying to adjust to an unfamiliar body when there’s a child’s shriek.

“Miss Frizzle!”

She furrows her brow in confusion while Sherlock chuckles next to her. Nathan is looking up at her adoringly, while his siblings arrive later. The older two give her a look of surprise but seem to realize who she is quickly. “Layla, Cooper, look it’s Ms. Frizzle!” That has the eldest two erupting in peals of laughter. She sends Sherlock a pleading look and luckily he obliges.

“A woman from a children's cartoon. She had red hair like yours is at the moment.”

“I see.” She doesn’t really but lets it go, “Nathan, I’m still Loki. Just, a different look to what you’ve seen before.”

He accepts it but still looks incredibly excited “Can you take us somewhere in a magic school bus?”

“I- maybe? I can teleport you elsewhere with magic.”

Sherlock shakes his head, “We need to go now before anyone else finds us.”

Loki nods, trying to think of a destination. Finally, one pops up in her mind and she gathers her magic before teleporting the five of them away.


	7. Of Kings and Queens

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Mentions of past child abuse, but nothing graphic.

They don’t stay in any one place for long, hopping all over Midgard. The children enjoy it and get to see more of their realm in a day than they have in their entire lives. Of the numerous Midgardian landmarks even Loki is impressed by a few, his favorites include the Pyramids, Machu Picchu, the Louvre, and the Northern lights. It’s a good deal of fun. That is until Loki lets her guard down for a split second and is rewarded with a sword breaking through her armor and grazing her skin. After that close call, they abandon Midgard and travel through a secret path through Yggdrasil to Aflheim.

As they arrive on Aflheim, Loki shifts back into his more familiar male form, his female form had obviously not thrown off their pursuers, not that he’d really expected it would. Even shifting is taxing when normally it would be simple as blinking; teleporting five people vast distances is draining on its own, and the sight of Aflheim and what it means drains him even more. He’s slightly jealous of Sherlock’s calm apathy towards most situations, a far cry from his own anxiety. How exactly is he supposed to explain the situation?  _ ‘I know I’m a wanted criminal but I hope you won’t capture me and send me to Asgard. Also, I have the children of my enemy but it’s for their own safety, I swear I’m not kidnapping them. Oh and some man I’ve never met is sending mercenaries after me to make me his broodmare because apparently that’s all I’m good for. And by the way, your dead nephew was reincarnated as a mortal and he’s here and I’m an argr and have seduced him into my bed. That’s all fine right? _ ’

Sherlock sighs, “Loki, you’re overthinking things.”

“You’re underthinking! What the Hel am I supposed to say, to explain all of this? Do I tell him about us?!?”

“That would probably help.”

Loki sucks in a breath, suddenly feeling light-headed. He’s never told anyone about his feelings towards men- or rather towards Sigurd, since he’d been his first and only love.  _ Is he still my only love? He and Sherlock are basically the same person, aren’t they? Do they count as one or two? Probably irrelevant _ . Sigyn had discovered them, Baldr and Hodr probably suspected it, Hel half of Asgard called him argr though whether they actually believed he was one is another issue. Sigurd had it easy- “Sherlock have you- did you tell anyone that you liked men?”

Sherlock shrugs, “Possibly. Well, I’m not exactly Gay like you are. I’d consider myself more towards the asexual spectrum, and panromantic. I’ve never been a fan of discussing my personal life but it’s possible I’ve mentioned it before.”

The God’s face falls, “Oh. Of course. I just… don’t know how to tell someone that I… desire men… and not women.”

“I can explain things if you’d like.”

Loki shakes his head, “No. I love you, but you lack… tact. You’d just as soon walk straight in and announce yourself. ”

Sherlock shrugs looking unconcerned, “Why not?”

“Because- You’ve been dead! We mourned you, you can’t just pop back in like nothing happened. Sometimes it’s better to use a bit of discretion. Especially when it involves the deaths of loved ones. It’s better if you wait here with the children.”

“You’re catastrophizing.”

Loki can’t help but smirk, “Well, yes, that’s what I do.”

Sherlock rolls his eyes but doesn’t further argue. And really it shouldn’t surprise him, he’d known him for how many centuries? “Mind the children, love,” Loki says absently. He regrets it the instant he says it, a dull echo of their former life and family that hurts his own heart. Loki does his best to collect himself before fleeing the palace.

Loki arrives far quicker than he’d hoped. He announces himself to a guard and waits nervously. It doesn’t take long before he’s led to the throne room. He prepares himself for questions as he enters, but he’s absolutely not prepared to be pulled into a tight hug. It catches him off guard, but it’s not entirely unpleasant. “Your Majesty?”

Thrymr releases him. “Apologies, Loki. It’s been a long time since I’ve seen you. You’ve grown up since we last spoke.”

The last time they’d talked had been after Sigurd had died. “True enough, your grace.”

The King waves his hand dismissively, “No need for the formalities of the court. Sigyn and Sigurd were almost as much my children as Nanna, you’re still family as far as I’m concerned.”

That’s actually touching. Loki internally curses himself as his eyes tear up “That’s- ermm Thank you, that means a lot, actually.” Loki clears his throat. “There’s something important I was hoping to discuss with you.”

Thrymir nods encouragingly at him and Loki takes a deep breath, trying to calm himself and failing horribly. “I take it you’re aware of my actions on Midgard.”

“Yes.” Thrymr doesn’t elaborate, eyes watching Loki’s very carefully. They remind him of his love's for a moment, which is oddly comforting. 

“Thor took me to one of his allies' homes to cure his poisoned son. I did so but it was clear said poison was a trap set for me. Thor and his Avengers left me there and sent someone else to ‘watch me’ in their stead.” Loki pauses to collect himself. “That person was, well when I saw his face I could not believe it. I thought it was Sigurd, and in a way it was, he’s a reincarnation of your nephew. He’s regained some memories though they seem to come randomly and are out of order.”

Thrymir smiles brightly, blue eyes shining with joy. “Sigurd is alive?!”

“In a way, yes. He prefers to be called Sherlock.” Loki pauses again. “He’s here, waiting. I thought it best to prepare you, he’d have walked right in if I’d allowed him.”

The king chuckles, “That sounds like my nephew.”

“We had an issue with mercenaries who wanted to capture me. They showed up at the home where we were at and took the children hostage. We killed them of course, but more kept coming so we brought the children with us to keep them safe while we figure out what to do. I hope that’s alright.”

“Of course, Loki. We’d never turn away a child in need.”

Loki’s heart is thudding in his chest as he tries to address the issue at hand. Well, not an issue, rather an uncomfortable truth. “I- uhh Sigurd, well Sherlock and I, or I guess Sigurd too… ehmm…” He was not off to a good start.  _ Idiot. Stop babbling and put your silvertongue to good use! _ “Well we- we have-”

Thrymir takes pity on him.“You’ve been in a romantic relationship that went far beyond the bond of friendship?”

“You knew?!?!” Loki screeches. It’s probably not an appropriate way to address a king but at the moment he doesn’t care.

“Well…” Thrymir starts, expression looking far too much like his nephew’s ‘explanation face’. “The pair of you weren’t exactly subtle. Whenever you were in danger, Sigurd was there rushing into the fray to help you. You looked at him like he was your entire world, and he protected you like you were his. He was gentle with you, which is not something that could describe him often. The one thing I wasn’t clear of in the beginning was how much Sigyn knew, but that became apparent with the birth of Nari and Vali.”

He could almost scream. Who else knew about them? He hadn’t thought they were that obvious, though Sigyn had teased them about it. Actually, he feels the beginning of a migraine forming, and Loki sighs, pinching his brow. “I take it you’d like to meet Sherlock?”

“Of course, there’s much to discuss.”

When Sherlock speaks to his Uncle, Loki takes his leave, giving them time to catch up. Instead, Loki watches the Barton children, all three of them seem to have adjusted very well. The boys are both playing with Alfr children of comparable ages, while Layla talks to a very smitten looking Alfr servant of around the same age, comparatively. Actually, the two of them bare watching, the adolescents look absolutely taken with one another. It reminds him a bit of himself and Sigurd at that age.

_ Loki rushes out of the palace grounds, darts across the outskirts of the city, and into the Iron Woods, where a pathway to Alfheim waits. He's incredibly excited to spend time with Sigurd, alone, and unbeknownst to the adults for the first time since they agreed to court. He slips through it easily, grinning widely. He doesn’t go far before Sigurd comes into view and his heart leaps with joy and anticipation. Loki rushes to the other boy and hugs him tightly before letting go hurriedly. “Is that okay? Can we hug?” _

_ Sigurd shrugs unperturbed, “That’s fine with me.” _

_ Loki beams and this time Sigurd wraps his arms around him. He’s never felt half as safe as he does in Sigurd’s arms. Eventually, they sit on the ground and cuddle, while talking about their respective school mates and family. _

_ “How has your father been?” _

_ “The same. Well, he hasn’t beaten Sigyn or I so far this week but he’s been at the tavern most of it.” _

_ “I’m sorry Sigurd.” Loki blinks trying to keep tears from falling. “I’ve complained about my family and you-” _

_ “Please. At times I think I have it easier than you. I know my father doesn’t love me. My mother’s dead but we were never close so I don’t particularly care. At least I have Sigyn and Uncle Thrymir. I might not be well-liked on Alfheim but they don’t treat me half as badly as the Aesir do you. Your father may not physically hurt you, but certainly emotionally neglects you by constantly comparing you to your brothers and favoring them over you. Thor’s an idiot who hurts you regardless of whether he intends to or not. Baldr and Hodr love you, and your mother to a degree but not as unconditionally as the twins, she’s too easily swayed by Odin. The rest of Asgard treats you like they would a Jotun who wandered in through their walls.” _

_ Loki sags and goes silent, Sigurd is always right but it still hurts.  _

_ There’s a moment of hesitation and Sigurd glances down at Loki, “Not good?” _

_ Loki smiles sadly, “It’s okay. It was only the truth. It just stings a bit.” _

_ Sigurd doesn’t respond but does pull him closer. Loki turns to him and gives a small smile at the affectionate act. Gingerly, Loki places a soft kiss on Sigurd’s lips. Sigurd kisses back just as gently. It’s not hurried or passionate, but tender and intimate. Loki decides he likes these kisses the best. _

Loki sighs, he and Sigurd had been so sweet and innocent. In a way, he misses those days. He notices Layla and the Aflr boy sneaking off and groans, wondering what a responsible adult would do. They’re both nearly adults but technically Loki is her guardian at the moment.  _ Fuck it. They’ll be fine. Even if I stop them now, they’ll find a way to get together again, Sigurd and I certainly did. _ He purposefully ignores them, hoping he’s not making a huge mistake.

He gets antsy after a couple of hours pass and neither Sherlock nor Layla reappear. It’s getting dark, the market has closed, and the boys are clearly tired and hungry. It’s another hour before Layla returns escorted by her new friend. The Alfr boy bows deeply when they approach, “Prince Loki. I apologize for keeping your ward, I was just showing her around.”

The servant boy's naive earnestness is far too cute and combined with Layla’s pleading eyes the God can’t bring himself to be angry, though he’s not above a bit of teasing. He inclines his head in acknowledgment. “I trust she was in good hands,” he says, voice crisp and cold.

He’s clearly nervous, “Yes, your highness! I ensured Lady Layla was perfectly safe at all times.”

Loki’s eyes are hard and calculating as he stares the adolescent down “I hope so. Her father is a very powerful warrior, who is close to crown prince Thor, he would be most… displeased if something were to happen to her.”

The boy's eyes widen and Layla scowls at him. “Loki, stop scaring Fynir!”

Immediately his eyes soften and he grins mischievously at Fynir. “Sorry, Fynir. It was just a bit of fun, I am the God of Mischief after all. You seem like a very sweet and respectable young man.”

The youth blinks, stunned, before managing a response.“I- Thank you, Prince Loki. Lady Layla, it was lovely spending time with you. I will take my leave if you will have it.”

“Of course,” Loki says, amusement evident in his voice.

He’s quick to scurry off and Layla glares at Loki. “You scared him away! How could you?!? I like him, he’s cute and kind, and smart, I never find boys like him at home!”

“Oh, he’ll be back, I’m sure. He seemed very taken with you. And if he’s not, well, evidently he didn’t care enough to try and you’re better off without him.”

“I can handle myself!” She snaps, glaring angrily. “Why do all men think I need someone to look out for me?”

Loki shrugs, “You’re young and vulnerable. Better to be overprotective than not enough and have something awful happen. I’d do the same if your brothers were sneaking off with someone I didn’t know.”

“I’m not a child!”

“Nor are you an adult. I am responsible for you at the moment, and I’d rather have your ire than risk you being harmed.”

“You’re even more paranoid than my Dad, and that’s saying something.”

Loki gives a sad smile, “I learned the hard way that it’s better to be cautious.”

“From those men who captured me?”

The God freezes, before forcing himself to relax, “Yes.”

There's curiosity in her eyes as she asks,“What happened?”

The world seems to still as Loki fights to repress his memories, and to his dismay, he’s only semi-successful. He’d truly thought he had outgrown the fear and revulsion and crippling sense of worthlessness that had previously been triggered by the memories of his kidnapping, but it seems that was not in fact the case. He quells the flood, but only just, he stands on the precipice of teetering over the edge and losing himself to panic.

Sherlock arrives at that moment, and Loki sags in relief. It gives him just enough strength to shut down his negative emotions, at least momentarily. Loki smiles weakly, “Hello, my love.”

The detective’s eyes roam over his lover's body and he frowns, “Loki...” Said God avoids his gaze and the mortal sighs, dropping it for the moment. “We have much to discuss. Layla, please gather your siblings, my Uncle is having rooms in the palace arranged for all of us.”

She nods and glances at Loki’s face apologetically before darting off to do as asked. It doesn’t take long and then they make their way to the palace. The children gawk and stare at it in obvious shock. Unlike the blinding gold of Asgard’s royal palace, Aflheim’s palace is a smooth white, still striking but not overwhelming. It’s far less ostentatious than Asgard and more elegant and refined, much closer to Loki’s own taste. Upon arriving inside, servants are quick to escort the children to their own rooms, and it’s only because of his trust in Thrymir and Sherlock that he allows it. Another beckons them and escorts them farther into the palace, into the Royal Wing.

Loki glances at Sherlock questioningly, but his unspoken question goes unanswered. They’re led to a guest room and the servant bows, “Your room my princes.”

Loki’s eyebrows shoot up but Sherlock doesn’t seem surprised. More to discuss indeed. The servant gives a brief tour before Sherlock manages to chase him away, huffing as he does so. “Why do they always do that? We’ve spent plenty of time in the palace before.”

“Sherlock. Can we please have our discussion.”

“Ahh. Well, my Uncle has decided that I am going to be King. My cousin Nanna is no longer in line for the throne, which unfortunately leaves me.”

The God’s heart drops and his face falls. “Oh.”

“Are you upset about it?”

“Not that you’re going to be King. But what it means for us.," Loki grimaces, "You’ll have to find a Queen-”

“Why?”

That makes Loki frown, “To produce an heir and secure the throne.”

Sherlock gazes intensely into Loki’s eyes and smirks, “You could do that. Prince Consort Loki sounds nice doesn’t it?”

“They won’t accept-”

The detective's face hardens, “They will or the line of succession will change. Uncle’s already agreed to it. That’s why we’re sharing these rooms. He’ll have to discuss it with his council of course, but I believe we stand a good chance.”

“You would have us be official?” Loki asks, eyes wide with confusion and panic.

“I thought you’d be happy. Do you not want this?”

Loki shakes his head, “It’s not about what I want-”

“It is. I wouldn’t have anyone else by my side. I’d be a rubbish King without you.”

That breaks something inside Loki, mostly in a good way. “Alright, Sherlock.”

The detective brightens, “Excellent! We should sleep, we have to be up early to meet the counsel.”

Loki groans loudly and throws himself down onto the bed in a very adult, not dramatic fashion and certainly does not hear his detective chuckling at his antics. Traitor.


	8. Of Princes and Kings

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here's a new chapter, finally! It's been 2/3 completed for over a month now, with the last 1/3 being rewritten a few times. I have the arc planned out for once, just struggled with this bit for some reason.

Loki has been through many things in his long life, but right now speaking to King Thrymir’s council feels like one of the most terrifying. Even with Sherlock present, and reassuring he feels nauseous. If he thought he could get away with it, he’d run and hide in their chamber, but he’s fairly certain that would do nothing but harm their case. So Loki waits with Sherlock until the councilmen arrive, staring in bewilderment at Sherlock, and so the attention is drawn away from him. All but one of them is familiar, having been in their position since he’d first met Sigurd. The one exception is a young man, who likely had succeeded his father or uncle, Loki makes a careful note of him, his recent addition could make him an ally or an enemy.

Thrymir clears his throat. “You can see why I’ve asked you here today. Sigurd is returned, albeit in a nonconventional way, and as such he is heir to the throne, unless there are any objections?”

“No, my King,” The eldest, a grizzled looking man with a short grey beard-whose name eludes him, starts, “But how can this be?”

It’s Sherlock that speaks. “I was reincarnated as a mortal. I only regained my memories of my past life upon meeting Loki.”

Internally, Loki winces, that was the wrong thing to say as it has brought all the attention and thus suspicion onto him.

“The mortality is a problem-”

“One I’m already working to correct, Lord Faerun. I’ve made contact with Idunn and one of my most trusted allies is negotiating for several of her golden apples. Things are going well so far and we likely will have them shortly.”

That’s news to Loki, but it’s very welcome. He’d hate to lose his love again. A glance at Sherlock shows that he’s surprised as well.

The councilmen all nod faces all carefully blank. Finally, another man speaks, one with greying red hair speaks, “So you wish us to approve him as your heir? But you would not have summoned us so quickly if that was all?”

Thrymir sighs, “No, there is something else. Sigurd, or Sherlock as he now prefers, wishes us to approve his choice of Consort as a condition for his acceptance of the throne.”

A murmur goes through the assembled men, but it’s the youngest who fixes his eyes on Loki.  _ He’s clever. Let’s hope he’ll prove to be an ally.  _ Sherlock also seems to be intrigued by the man, judging by how hard he’s staring.

The young man speaks, “I assume, Prince Sigurd wishes Prince Loki to be his consort?”

It says quite a lot that the man used titles of respect for both him and Sherlock, even if he’d reverted to Sherlock’s old name. There are noises of surprise from the rest of the council but Thrymir simply inclines his head. “I believe the union will be advantageous. Prince Loki is intelligent and well versed in the ways of the court and is a far better diplomat than my nephew is. They’ll balance each other well. Additionally, it’ll give us close ties to Asgard. ”

There are more murmurs, some look intrigued by the prospect while others look uneasy. It’s the greying red-haired man that voices his concerns. “All due respect, your majesty, but Prince Loki has been… rather disparaged by the nobility of Asgard-”

“Yes, Lord Laegai, but he has not been renounced as a son of Odin, nor has his title been revoked. He is in good enough standing to provide clout, but poor enough standing that Odin will likely not make many if any, demands of us in exchange for losing a potential heir.”

Loki blinks, that’s actually a good point. Odin won’t fight for him and losing him and his descendants to marriage to another realm is not much of an issue at this point, actually, it’s likely a bonus. The chance for pretenders to Thor’s future throne will diminish greatly. The other councilmen weigh Thrymir’s words, and by the look of things look ready to accept.

The young man, coughs delicately, drawing the attention of all in the room. “I have a proposition if you would hear it, my King.”

Thrymir nods encouragingly, “What is it Lord, Huylin?

“I propose that Prince Loki not be made Prince Sigurd’s consort.” 

There’s a ripple of surprise that reverberates throughout the room and Loki’s heart sinks. They’d been so close. Surely, they won’t lose it now? Loki glances at Sherlock who is staring intensely, expression unreadable.

Huylin takes a breath, aware all eyes are on him, some more hostile than others. “Instead I propose that Prince Loki be made King, on equal standing with Prince Sigurd, once Prince Sigurd takes the throne. Prince Loki will be less limited in his actions that way, and better able to serve our realm.”

That sends a ripple of shock through all, even his astute mortal. Loki is surprised, but he sees how carefully calculated the risk is. Being new to the council, Huylin has less ties to the other councilmen, currying favor with the future rulers would cement his position and increase his power and influence. And for the other councilmen to dissent now would paint them in a bad light in the future King’s mind even if Loki is rejected altogether. It’s a dicey move, but one that could serve the man well if he’s lucky. Loki’s impressed with his expert maneuvering, Huylin would make a great ally or a terrible enemy. 

The other council members murmur, trying to decide how they should respond. Sherlock rolls his eyes at their indecisiveness, “We’re all perfectly aware that Loki is the more diplomatic of the two of us. He’ll be making most of the decisions regardless of whether or not you approve it.”

Loki winces at the mortal’s bluntness. Councilor Laegai gives him an appraising look, “That does not mean the people will approve. Losing the support of the populace is an invitation to rebellion.”

Sherlock opens his mouth to retort and Loki winces, afraid of what will come out but Thrymir interjects. “Loki had always been well-loved by our people. They will likely take to him easier than they would a stranger from another land who ended up as their ruler.”

That at least steers the conversation back to safer ground. There’s a bit more debate before the councilmen seem to accept it. “We aren’t opposed to the match as long as the future of the kingdom is secured. As long as Sigurd produces children with a suitable woman, who will inherit the throne.”

Sherlock glares, “Loki is the one who will carry my children, he’s perfectly capable of it.”

Loki flushes red in embarrassment, he’s still a little ashamed about the matter, and tries to avoid the many sets of eyes that are locked onto him. He clears his throat awkwardly, “Ahh. Yes, I should be able to- uhh- conceive. Part of being a natural shapeshifter, I suppose.”

The man doesn’t look convinced. “Healer Gerdr will verify that.”

Loki inclines his head, “Naturally.” Gerdr… She was one of the handful of people that Loki considered trustworthy. She’d helped nurse him back to health after- well… after his kidnapping. Gerdr had proven herself to be a good woman even more than an excellent healer and had been very understanding of his issues following his rescue. If anyone was to do something so awkward to him, Gerdr would be his first choice.

Sherlock’s eyes are narrowed at the councilman, as though he’s about to say something nasty, Loki nudges him gently drawing his lover’s eyes onto him. The detective huffs but doesn’t challenge Laegai any further, but he does wrap an arm around Loki protectively while glaring at the councilman making his feelings abundantly clear. Wisely Laegai backs off but Sherlock doesn’t release him, intent on displaying exactly how he feels about his future husband.

_ Husband.  _ The thought sends a thrill through the trickster. Never in all his thousand years would he have thought such a thing would be possible, at least not in the nine realms. Outside of the nine there were places where people would not have minded, but those places had always seemed so far away and lonely. A daydream more than an actual possibility. His younger self would have a conniption if he could see them now, he’d been a dramatic youth with a penchant for pessimism and paranoia combined with an inferiority complex. In short, he’d been a hormonal wreck and it was a wonder that Sigurd had managed to put up with him.

Sherlock gives him a gentle nudge and Loki snaps back to reality. The council is dismissing itself at this point, everyone seemed satisfied with how things had worked out. Overcome with a sudden rush of affection, Loki gives Sherlock a quick kiss, and his heart soars as though it was their first, all those centuries ago.

_ Loki paces nervously, terrified of what could happen if something goes wrong and they’re caught. Or worse, what if Sigurd changed his mind? What if he had only been pretending and actually hated him? What if- _

_ “Loki.” _

_ The young prince whirls around, relaxing at the sight of Sigurd. “You came!” _

_ Sigurd frowns, “Yes? We’d agreed that I’d meet you here… You still believe I’m lying to you?” _

_ The trickster fidgets, "No, I was just concerned that I’d misunderstood or you’d changed your mind.” _

_ “I wouldn’t do that.” _

_ “I know, truly I do, but I can’t stop myself from worrying…. I’ve thoroughly ruined the mood haven’t I?”  _

_ Sigurd laughs and Loki flushes in embarrassment, but can’t help but grin when the other boy smiles brightly at him. Sigurd offers him a hand and Loki takes it, allowing himself to be led. It’s not their first time sneaking around with one another but it was their first time as an actual couple with romantic intentions and it’s a little daunting for the Asgardian prince.  _

_ The young lord leads the prince far away from the walls of Asgard, the duo dodging guards as they go until at last they reach the Iron Woods. Loki follows with trepidation, it’s a dangerous place, it was not unheard of for an unwary traveler or child to be killed by a Bilgesnipe or any of the carnivores that made their home in the woods, especially in the heart where they seem to be headed. Loki grips Sigurd's hand tightly, in a silent question but the other only jerks his head towards their current trajectory. Loki sighs and casts a wary eye around them before allowing Sigurd to drag him further in. _

_ As they reach a point where it’s hard to move forwards, so thick are the trees, Loki starts to protest before they breakthrough into a clearing. Abruptly Loki shuts his mouth, taking in the area, it’s very secluded which had likely been what Sigurd had been going for. _

_ “That was a strenuous journey.” _

_ “But we should be safe from prying eyes here.” _

_ Loki nods, “That is certainly true.” _

_ There’s an awkward pause as both stare at the other, uncertain of what to do now that they’re actually alone. It’s Sigurd that breaks the silence by talking about one of latest experiments- a potion capable of discerning old bloodstains from regular stains. It lulls them both back into a sense of security and they spend several more hours talking like they normally did until at last they have to return.  _

_ Loki gives a shy smile, “That was nice.” _

_ “Agreed.” _

_ There’s another pause and Loki starts to pick at his sleeve nervously, uncertain of what he wants, much less what is expected of him. “Errm. I guess- I’ll see you tomorrow?” _

_ “Yes.” Sigurd’s eyes are staring intently into Loki’s observing his reaction. He steps closer and Loki’s eyes immediately dart to Sigurd’s lips. The other boy takes this as confirmation moves closer to the prince before slowly leaning in and bringing his lips to Loki’s. Their kiss is soft and hesitant, both getting used to the sensation. It doesn’t last very long before they break apart, foreheads resting against each other. It’s then that Loki is hit with a certainty- This was real, and for as long as they lived they’d care for one another. _


End file.
